Saturday, July 23, 2011

Not getting any worse . . .

So that’s doesn’t sound terribly exciting – not getting any worse – but believe me it is a step in the right direction!  Tim left today for ASP (mission trip, Appalachia Service Project) and will be gone all week.  So Stella and I get to hang out and do our thing together.  This hardly ever happens, although Tim and Stella spend a lot of one on one time when I travel.   I was really looking forward to this week until I started feeling so crappy with the OHSS stuff.  Mom is here for the weekend, and will take Stella to day care on Monday before she heads home, so that takes some of the pressure off.  I really need to go to work on Monday. 

I’m also trying not to obsess too much about the beta test on Monday.  The thing is, we’ve been here before.  At least one of the pregnancies that didn’t make it had betas where the numbers weren’t quite going up as they should.  I don’t recall all the details of those cycles as I they were so stressful and sad that I didn’t keep track of all the details, let alone remember it.   I know we are incredibly lucky to have Stella and to have had one positive outcome.  That doesn’t cure me of wanting more of the awesome magic that we get to experience every day.  It’s almost more difficult because life with Stella is so great.    

Great in so many ways, except that she was exposed to a kid at day care that was diagnosed with hand, food and mouth disease.  Oh Lord, please do not let her have this!  I can’t deal with a sick kid when I’m barely dragging my butt around.  I also need to go to work, not take the week off because she can’t go to day care.  Oh yeah, the other thing I’m praying for is that no one else at day care gets it because half the kids there are Margie’s own, and if they are contagious, Stella can’t go.

 The other new, fun twist is Stella is experiencing night terrors.  These are the scariest things I have ever seen.  It is seriously like she is possessed.  Her eyes are wide open, she is screaming at the top of her lungs and practically foaming at the mouth.  She’s not awake and you can’t wake her up or soothe her very easily.  Not sure what to do about this.  The only thing that has worked so far has been to rock her and take her to the guest bedroom and hold her until she calms down.  She’s incredibly restless after that, but not screaming and going stiff as a board.  No one gets much sleep.  I’ll have to talk to other mothers and see if anyone else has dealt with it.  Hope I’m in a better frame of mind tomorrow! 

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